


Cupidity

by ratadder



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-01-20
Updated: 2003-01-20
Packaged: 2018-11-20 18:35:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11341035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratadder/pseuds/ratadder
Summary: The course of true love can run smoothly. with enough divine intervention to choke a horse.





	Cupidity

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Basement](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Basement), which moved to the AO3 to ensure the stories are always available and so that authors may have complete control of their own works. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Basement's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thebasement/profile).

 

Cupidity

### Cupidity

#### by Ratadder

Author's Note on Timing: This story takes place between TWO FATHERS and ONE SON. Because that's when the challenge was issued, in the week. And because that's when I wrote the entire rough. On Valentine's Day, before 9pm. And I'm not rewriting it to make the events of ONE SON fit. 

* * *

**CUPIDITY**  
by Ratadder

* * *

Cupid hovered uncertainly in midair. Shoving streaked-blond hair off his forehead, he eyed his assignment through the window. This couldn't be right. Gnawing on his lower lip he fingered the special arrow he'd prepared, and tried to decide what to do. 

_Okay, so the guy's only got one arm. I suppose that might turn some people off. But still. This just can't be right._

Sighing deeply, he concluded he should just bite the bullet and double-check the assignment. Better safe than sorry... for some reason, Washington DC always equaled bad news. And after that colossal screw up with Monica and Bill, he was on mighty thin ice on Olympus. Wincing internally, he tossed back his head and shouted, "Yo! _MOM_." 

Rolling his eyes at the chime of bells announcing her arrival, he schooled his face into its customary sexy pout and turned to face the Goddess of Love. Carefully averting his eyes from her spilling cleavage, he stopped another deeper sigh only through sheer force of will. He _really_ wished she wouldn't... jiggle quite so much around _him_ at least. 

"You rang, honey?" Aphrodite reached out and tousled his hair, giving him her best sparkly smile. 

Cupid pointed at the window. "Ma, this gig is like _so_ screwed up. Get a load of the mark. He's totally too hot for mortality. No way does this dude need our help. What's the word here? Somebody got some, like, major wires crossed or what?" 

Aphrodite leaned in and grinned at the figure moving around the room getting dressed. "Oooh, I know. Bitchin', isn't he? Wouldn't mind if he was my personal assignment." 

The warmth in her voice made Cupid grit his teeth. He was used to having a mother the entire mortal world wanted to take to bed, and he was even used to having her respond favorably to the idea, but he didn't have to like it. " _Ma._ Can you like totally get to the point? What's the deal? No _way_ does that piece need an arrow from me. Why in Tartarus would _he_ need divine intervention to make everyone love him?" 

Aphrodite heaved a deep sigh and Cupid bit his tongue restraining himself from asking her to _please_ not do that in _that_ outfit. 

"You _so_ don't know the half of it, honey," she insisted mournfully, wrapping an arm around Cupid's shoulders and gesturing at the cutie on the other side of the glass. "He's had a rough life. He's not exactly on anyone's Miss Popularity list. Trust me. He may not look it, but if anybody needs our help, it's him." 

She sounded just a tad too selfless. Cupid eyed her suspiciously. "Out with it, Ma." 

Aphrodite blinked, gave him a wide-eyed smile, and twisted a fluffy blond curl around one finger. "Out with _what_ , sweetie?" 

"What's the real deal? C'mon. You can snow Zeus with the big blue eyes, but this is _me_." 

"Oh _fine_." Aphrodite traded in the innocent look for petulant, and crossed her arms over her chest. "Although he really _does_ need our help. But... well," she glanced off to one side. "Technically it involves your uncle Ares..." 

"Aw _Mom_! Not that again. Every time you get into a spat with somebody in the family, we all suffer." 

"Nonsense! Don't talk to your mother that way. This is serious, Cupey. It's a matter of family honor!" 

"Ares' honor or ours?" 

"Ours, of course. Whataya think? Ares has been dissing the power of love! We can't have that, now can we? You're the God of Love; you have a responsibility! Look honey, honestly, Ares has been meddling in that poor mortal's life since day _one_. We're just trying to give the boy a fighting chance! A chance to really _choose_. Balancing the scales, so to speak. He's lovely, sure... but that sweet-looking mortal has been worshipping at the feet of Strife and Discord for _way_ too long." Aphrodite rolled her eyes and sneered. "And those two _so_ get on my nerves. Now it's time to see what the power of love -- and I mean the power of _L-O-V-E_ \-- can do for someone like him." 

Cupid snorted. "Let me guess. You and Ares were hitting the ambrosia a little too hard and decided to make a bet." Aphrodite's mouth twisted in a way that told Cupid he was dead-on. "Oh _man_. MA! This isn't an assignment at all, is it?! It's just another game! You're just trying to one-up Ares by subverting one of his!" 

Aphrodite's eyes narrowed. "Sweetie, that boy _needs_ us. He doesn't belong to Ares yet. Trust me on this, it may sound like a game to you, but this _is_ an assignment. Now you've got the arrow... do the shooting." Her voice firmed and she pointed through the window emphatically, where the occupant was heading for the door, obviously ready to leave. 

Cupid gave her a tired look, but strung his bow. "Okay, Ma, but let me tell you, _you're_ dealing with the fall-out from this one. Uncle Ares is like _totally_ beyond my toleration." Cupid sighted on the front door of the building and waited. As the dark figure moved out into the February sun and turned his back on the hovering gods, Cupid released the arrow and watched with satisfaction as it flew straight and true. Perfect strike. A fine gold mist washed up over the man, who stopped short, looking around as if he'd been pinched. "There. Everybody will adore him for the next twelve hours. And I mean _everybody_. They won't be able to remember ever feeling any other way about him." Cupid shook his head. "Later, Ma. Hope you know what you're doing," he tossed off, then disappeared with a clap of his hands. 

Aphrodite narrowed her eyes at the glamoured man on the street in front of her. "Such a good son, my little boy... but no imagination." Shaking her head and smiling widely, she crooked a finger and _nudged_ the spell just a touch. "How about... 'the more the antipathy in the beholder, today's attraction will be that much bolder'. THAT should make things interesting." With a giggle, she blew a kiss at the object of her attention and disappeared as well. 

* * *

Alex Krycek's head whipped around as a second flash of golden light skimmed the edge of his vision. What the _fuck_? He shivered, trying to dislodge the feeling that he'd just been zapped with static electricity. Glancing down at himself he brushed his good hand over his jacket and slacks. No sizzle of static. He shrugged. 

Shaking his head, he walked to the car and jumped in, trying to focus on the first appointment of the day. His mind refused to cooperate, seemingly more concerned with the fact that he was working on Valentine's Day when he should be getting drunk and brooding about might-have-beens with the local endangered wildlife. He caught sight of the dashboard clock glaring 9:00 AM at him, and pushed the thoughts away and started the car. Enough time to get drunk and fox-maudlin later. At the moment, he had a long drive ahead. 

* * *

Leaning on the doorbell at Spender's apartment four hours later, Krycek bounced impatiently on the balls of his feet and wondered again if he should have taken his morning appointment up on that... somewhat surprising offer. He hoped he hadn't offended the woman. It wasn't everyday a Syndicate informant just back from Tunisia offered to give him a blowjob before handing over twice the expected information and telling him the encryption code on the confidential disk she was delivering. 

Krycek's suspicious mind assumed a trap. He'd never even thought Roberts particularly _liked_ him. But it wouldn't do to get her pissed at him. Maybe he should've let her suck his dick... where's the harm? But timing was too important today... Hopefully Roberts didn't take the refusal too personally... Frankly he'd much rather have taken up that overly-friendly waiter at the place he'd stopped to grab lunch on the run.... 

His musings were interrupted by Jeffrey Spender swinging open the front door. Spender's eyes focused on Krycek and his melancholy face brightened. Alex tilted his head to one side and studied the change suspiciously. "Jeffrey?" he inquired neutrally. 

"Krycek!" A quiver of excitement ran through Spender's voice. "Come in! How... lovely to see you!" 

Alex cocked his head forward and stared at Spender through his lashes. "You... knew I was coming, Jeff. Remember?" 

"Oh... oh yes. Of course," Spender giggled. 

Giggled? Alex took a closer look. Had Jeffrey been drinking? He certainly sounded a little breathy. Alex ran his tongue over his lips absently and took a sudden step backwards in shock as Spender's eyes fastened on the movement hungrily. He cleared his throat. "Jeff... um... you alright?" 

"Fine. Fine... please come in." Spender definitely sounded throatier than usual. Krycek eyed him warily for a moment, then sidled past him into the apartment and dropped the paper files on Spender's desk. 

"Alright, here's the information I'm carrying for your father. But we need to work fast. He's expecting me anytime and he _will_ notice if I'm late. You copy these, two sets, keep one for yourself, and reseal the originals in this. And don't _lick_ it. Use water to seal it. And here, wear these." He shoved a pair of thin gloves at Jeff. "He'll doubtless have the whole lot analyzed to see if I got into it. You take care of that... I want to boot up this disk." _Let's see if Roberts was telling the truth about that encryption code._

"I thought the disk was going to be encrypted." 

"It is. I think I have the code." 

"Oh Alex! You're so... resourceful!" 

Krycek slowly tilted his head to look at Spender, who stood holding the paper files, a dopey grin plastered on his face. "Uh... thanks, Jeff. Now how about that copying? We really do need to work fast." As Spender turned obediently and powered up the portable copy machine, Alex stared at the back of the curly head. What the _hell_? First Roberts, now this. 

No doubt about it, he was sticking with the new cologne. 

He turned his attention to the disk in hand, stuffing it into Spender's computer. And watched in amazement as the password Roberts had eagerly handed over opened up every single file on the disk. "Holy fuck," he breathed, excitement coursing through him. 

As he skimmed the files rapidly, he automatically started searching for snippets to feed to Mulder, before catching the direction of his thoughts and giving himself a mental kick. _For fuck's sake... stop worrying about getting in good with the Spooky-boy -- which you'll never do no matter how much information you feed him -- and start getting these files copied, asshole._ He steadfastly ignored the stab of pain the thought created and started saving files, the hum of the copy machine a droning background noise that was strangely soothing. 

The copier stopped before Krycek finished with his duplicate backups. Alex stiffened as he felt a body move to stand hard at his right shoulder. So close. Too close. Shooting a glance up through his lashes, Alex blinked at the adoring look Spender was giving him. "Almost done here," Alex muttered, moving his chair slightly to the left. A warm hand descended on his shoulder. He froze in his frantic copying, then forced himself to keep punching keys and swapping disks. _Time limit, Alex, time limit. Ignore the hand on the shoulder. It'll go away._

"Alex." 

"Jeff?" 

"Alex. I want to thank you. I don't know that I ever really thanked you... for your support, your understanding. Your help. That first night. You saved my life." 

Alex swallowed hard at the deepening note in Jeff's voice. "Don't mention it. Really." 

"No... I... it meant a lot..." 

The hand on his shoulder began to rub gently, as Spender's other hand moved to stroke the back of Alex's neck. He'd taken the gloves off. Long fingers traced over vertebra and moved up to play with the very bottom of Alex's hair. *Okay, no mistaking that. Fuck! This does _not_ fit The Jeffrey Spender Profile,* Alex thought desperately, swapping disks and nearly wiping out his back-up in his momentary confusion. _Don't have time for this now. Focus, dammit._

Leaping to his feet and backing away, Alex pocketed the duplicate disks and flashed Spender a charming smile. "Sorry Jeff, got to go, you understand. Can't keep your father waiting. Happy reading." He turned and bolted for the door, not bothering to wait and hear Jeff's response. 

* * *

Shaking off Spender's uncharacteristic actions, Krycek drove quickly to his rendezvous with the Smoking Man. But as he entered the office building and rode the elevator upwards, he returned to the subject. It was just odd. Roberts, Spender... neither of whom had shown any prior interest... The elevator doors opened and Alex dragged himself back on track. _Focus._

Exiting the elevator, he walked to the designated office. He took a deep breath, prepared to hold his patience and his tongue, and knocked sharply. At the summons he entered and strode over to the desk, handing over the envelope and the original disk. "Roberts' information." 

The Smoking Man leaned forward and stubbed out his cigarette. "Any difficulties?" 

_Aside from an amorous informant and your amorous son? No._ "No." 

"Excellent, Alex." The Smoking Man glanced from the material up to Krycek, meeting his gaze directly. Their eyes caught... and held. And held. Krycek met the stare firmly, wondering what new power game the man was playing at, when the severe face suddenly relaxed into a slow smile. "But then, I'm hardly surprised. Such a... competent operative. You always were one of our best." 

Alex felt his mouth drop open. 

The Smoking Man stood and moved slowly around the desk, the unnatural, beaming expression growing more entranced by the second. "Such a valuable employee. I don't know that we tell you often enough, Alex, how much we _appreciate_ you." 

_Okay, somebody needs to check me for missing time. I've obviously been abducted, and it became April while I was gone. And this is a very sick April Fools joke._ "Ah... thank you." _I think._

The Smoking Man stared down at him. "We should talk more, Alex. I don't know that I've ever told you... how much you _mean_ to the organization. To me. Oh and by the way, that's a very good look on you." The Smoking Man smiled coyly, his lashes lowering flirtatiously, and gestured with one hand, indicating the dark suit Krycek wore. Then the hand kept moving... reaching out... closer... brushing Krycek's cheek. 

Krycek fought not to stagger backward. "Uh... I think..." 

The Smoker's hand at his chin tilted his face, thumb stroking gently over the jawbone. "What do you think, Alex? Tell me. Tell me everything you think. I want to hear it all. I want-" 

Unable to restrain himself any longer, Alex jerked out of reach and started backing for the door. _Deja vu. How many Spenders do I need to run away from today?_ "I think... I need to be on my way. I'm... running late for another appointment. Yes... very late..." He didn't stop until he felt the doorknob digging him in the back. Reaching behind him he flung open the door, nodded once and scrambled for the elevator. 

He reached the elevator just as the doors opened to discharge three of the Syndicate heads. The three paused as Krycek rushed toward them, and Alex stalled long enough to see a glimmer in the First Elder's eye that he hoped _never_ to see there again. Choking out a panicked "hellogoodbye" he bounded into the elevator and jammed at the down button, giving a sickly smile to the First Elder as the man swung back around to watch him go, a forlorn look of loss coming over the round face. From the direction of the office he'd just left, Alex could hear a door open, and the plaintive voice of the Smoker calling "Wait! Alex, wait!" The doors slid closed and Krycek slumped against the wall as the elevator descended. 

His mind spun as he tried to sort out the day's experiences thus far. _Okay, option number one, my personal magnetism has finally exceeded even my own expectations. Option two, I've been exposed to some whacked Syndicate pheromone experiment without my knowledge. Option three, they all got together and decided to try to drive me stark raving mad by making me think they all want me. Oh fuck, now I sound like Mulder._ He winced at the easy way Mulder surfaced into his thoughts yet again, and headed for his car. The dull ache in his chest that accompanied thoughts of Mulder was nothing new, so he ignored it as he got in and fastened his seatbelt. 

Starting the car, he once again tried to get himself back on track... what came next? Home to get drunk. It was looking better and better. Pulling out, he edged the needle up well past the legal limit and headed for his current temporary home. His mind kept returning to the look on the Smoking Man's face as that hand had brushed his cheek... the gleam in the First Elder's eye... Spender's gooey expression... 

The blue light flashing in back of him finally forced its way through his preoccupation. "FUCK." Braking and pulling over, he slammed his good hand on the steering wheel and fumbled for his wallet, extracting a fake id to match the registration on the car. Rolling down the window he offered a smile at the approaching officer. "What seems to be the problem, officer?" he managed through gritted teeth. 

The stern face of the traffic cop relaxed slightly as he leaned down and looked into the car. "A little above the speed limit, son." 

"My apologies, officer, I didn't realize..." Extending the license and registration through the window, Krycek blinked in surprise as the man glanced at them for barely a second and handed them back with a wide smile. 

"Well, yes... no harm done, now was there. Slow it down a little... and you have a nice day, sir." The officer nodded benignly at him, shook his hand, patted the car door paternally, and turned and headed back to his patrol car. 

Alex sat staring through his windshield. "Pheromone experiment. Definitely a pheromone experiment." 

* * *

Home. Krycek sighed and dropped the purloined file copies on a chair, booting up his laptop and getting ready for a second, longer look at the disk contents. He'd worry about the weird way the Syndicate members were treating him later. He knew it was some sort of trick, he just couldn't see what they were _after_ with it. _Focus focus FOCUS._ Rubbing his forehead he tried to concentrate on the disk, and soon lost himself in selecting material for Mulder. 

By the time he was done it was later than he'd intended. He sat back and stretched, letting his mind relax until he caught himself getting excited at the thought of Mulder's reaction to the new secrets. He groaned and banged his head on the table next to his laptop. _Okay, definitely time for drunk-and-maudlin._ He ejected the disk, powered down the computer, and slipped the disk into his shirt pocket. 

Wandering to the kitchen he stopped short and smacked his already sore forehead as he realized he'd never restocked after his _last_ drunk-and-maudlin evening. He only allowed himself a D &M every so often, but he couldn't believe he'd been stupid enough not to be prepared for _Valentine's Day_. A classic D &M if there ever was one. 

He groaned and pulled on his boots. There was nothing for it but a run to the store. Maybe he could pick up a heartshaped box of candy and get _really_ pathetic. _Or maybe you could deliver the disk in the heartshaped box of candy,_ his traitorous mind whispered. Snorting at his own idiocy, he stalked out of the apartment. 

It was a Sunday. He was going to be stuck with supermarket beer. 

Happy fucking Valentine's Day. 

* * *

Walter Skinner stood in front of his full length mirror and twisted and turned, checking his appearance anxiously. He'd feel more comfortable in a suit, but who in hell wore a suit to the supermarket? He'd just have to do without the confidence-booster of a pressed shirt and power tie. 

He glanced at the clock. He had it timed perfectly. More than enough time to get there. As long as Valentine's Day didn't throw a kink in the schedule... he had a moment of uneasy panic, but stamped it down. If it did, it did. He could handle it. He'd been a Marine. 

He tried a warm smile at his reflection. _Surprise,_ he counseled himself, _aim for casual surprise._ Clearing his throat he practiced. "Well hello! What a surprise seeing you here!" Okay, it would be a lie... and he felt a little bad about that. But Assistant Directors of the FBI did _not_ admit to stalking their subordinates, discovering their weekly shopping schedules, and lying in wait for them at the grocery store. Deep breath. "Grocery shopping on Valentine's Day? That's terribly depressing. You should be celebrating the day. You know, I know this may sound rather forward, but it occurs to me I'm not your immediate superior any longer. Care to... go for a drink?" 

He winced at his reflection. Could he sound any _more_ idiotic? 

Rolling his head from shoulder to shoulder, he tried to relax his neck muscles. Doubting he was ever going to be relaxed again until after this was over one way or another, he sighed and went to get his coat. 

The drive to the supermarket took longer than anticipated. The heavier than usual Sunday-night traffic reminded Skinner of the federal holiday the next day, which most people, unlike himself, were actually going to take advantage of and _not_ go to work. He allowed himself a flash of optimism... depending on the events of tonight, perhaps he'd be enjoying the holiday as well. He smiled to himself as he pulled into a parking spot next to a sleek black car. 

Checking his watch, he hurriedly got out of the car and headed for the glass doors. Once inside the obnoxiously bright store, he scanned impatiently. Yes! There! Right on schedule... in the midst of the cantaloupe! 

His eyes focused only on the flash of beautiful red hair above dark coat, Skinner strode toward Produce, a man on a mission. 

* * *

Alex Krycek stalked around the store, trying to avoid people who seemed intent on smiling at him. Or winking at him, nodding to him, checking him out, brushing up against him... he sidestepped the third teenage girl to pause dumbstruck in his path, and rubbed his hand over his face. Life was getting too weird. Even for him. 

The woman in the blue sweater who had been shadowing him around the store suddenly rounded the aisle ahead of him. She was heading toward him again, a little too casually. For the first three aisles he'd thought she might be Syndicate. For the last ten minutes he'd just been getting annoyed. All he fucking wanted was a bag of pretzels to go with his beer. Was that too much to ask? He whirled and changed direction yet again, detouring toward Produce. 

But first, he walked into a wall. At least that was what if felt like. 

* * *

Dana Scully looked up at the sudden crash. Blinking in surprise, she saw AD Skinner and a tall dark man rebounding off each other and tripping over the fruit display they'd just knocked over. Skinner looked flustered, extending a hand to steady the other man... and then going completely still. Scully took another glance at the second man and almost tripped as well. Alex Krycek? 

* * *

Krycek stared in dismay at the man catching his arm. *Of all the people in all the supermarkets in all of DC, I gotta run into _him_?* Their eyes met for a long drawn-out moment. "Fuck," Alex managed succinctly as tangerines rolled around at his feet. 

"Alex?" gasped Skinner. 

_Oh no,_ thought Alex. 

"Where have you been?" Skinner exclaimed. "I've been expecting you ever since that day in my car!" Skinner's face softened. "Waiting for you to contact me. Hoping...," his deep voice husked lower. "You can't just disappear on me like that, Alex." 

" _Sir_?" 

Krycek tried to whirl at the sound of _that_ voice, but Skinner's hand on his right arm tightened possessively. He winced and swung his head to see that yes, that was indeed Dana Scully standing staring at the two of them with the sort of look she usually reserved only for Mulder's stupider theories. Blue eyes met green... and Krycek felt his knees buckle at the change that instantly swept over Scully. 

"ALEX!" She vaulted forward, narrowly missing skidding on a crushed tangelo, getting a death grip on his left arm. "It's been so long!" Starry-eyed and flushed, she pressed closer, one tiny hand keeping a firm hold on his prosthetic, the other reaching up to play with the buttons on his shirt. "Far too long. I think you and I need to have a long... private... talk. We should go somewhere... just the two of us. What do you say?" 

"Agent _Scully_." 

Scully turned at the gruff voice. "Sir?" 

"I have business with this man. You won't be taking him anywhere. He's coming with me." Skinner turned back to Krycek, his hand loosening to stroke up and down Alex's upper arm. "Aren't you, Alex?" 

Scully released Krycek to round on her former boss, hands on hips and eyes sparking. "Says who?" 

"Says _me_." 

"Oh no, you don't... you're not taking him anywhere..." 

Krycek eased out from under Skinner's grip as the big man towered over Scully. Backing up slowly, he stared at the bickering feds in sick amazement, then turned and walked out of the store as quickly as he could. 

In the parking lot he paused long enough to draw in a few gulps of cold air, then raced for his car. Backing out, he decided perhaps the entire city's water supply had been drugged this time. By the time he was on the road again, it occurred to him that maybe it was _his_ water supply that was drugged, and this was all a hallucination. 

Scully's adoring expression popped full-force into his mind and he shook his head and clenched the steering wheel tighter. Why on earth would he hallucinate _that_? 

Obviously this wasn't just a Syndicate game, since he couldn't see Scully and Skinner cooperating. Even for the admittedly tempting reward of driving Alex Krycek bonkers. That did of course leave "exposure to strange pheromone experimentation" open. But... if that was the case... and everyone was going to react like this... Slowly, the idea that had been floating around in the back of his mind pushed to the fore. 

And he found that his body had already figured it out, because the car was already driving toward Mulder's place. 

* * *

Apartment 42 beckoned. 

Taking a deep breath, Alex wedged the heartshaped box of candy more firmly under the prosthesis, and shifted his grip on the roses enough to knock. Predictable, but when you went shopping for Valentine's Day at 8:30 PM on the day in question, you took what you could find. He stepped back from the door and prayed to whatever deity might be listening that he didn't end up dead with a tacky box of valentine candy under his arm. The police shots would be excruciatingly humiliating. Even if he was dead. 

Noise on the other side of the door. Alex swallowed hard. The moment of truth. Was he the subject of a successful experiment to manipulate emotional and physical reactions, or was the entire world conspiring to get him to make a fool of himself? The doorknob rattled. Alex concentrated on trying not to look too hopeful. The door opened. 

**"KRYCEK?"**

Okay, so far so bad. That voice did not sound pleased. Alex's heart dropped to his feet. "Mulder. I just..." 

Mulder's eyes skimmed over the candy and the flowers, face going from angry to perplexed to suspicious to angry again. "What the-" He looked up... and met Alex's gaze. The moment stretched. Deepened. Pulled like taffy. 

Mulder's expression melted. " _Alex_." It was almost a growl. "Get the fuck in here." 

The throaty rumble of Mulder's voice was tugging Alex forward before he'd even realized he was moving. He stumbled into the apartment. *...I would walk into the fingers of your fire willingly...* echoed in his head. Until he realized the song clashed terribly with the strains of "Only You" floating from somewhere in the apartment. He almost rolled his eyes, but then, how much could one expect from an Elvis fan? The door closed behind him and suddenly Mulder was in front of him again, extending a finger to brush over one velvety rose. 

"For me?" 

"For you..." Alex croaked. Pushed the flowers forward. 

Mulder took the bouquet, biting his lip to keep from smiling. _Or laughing,_ Alex thought darkly. To give him credit, he did neither as he accepted the candy as well, when Alex shifted it to his right hand awkwardly and extended it. 

"I'd say what's the occasion, but given the theme, I'm assuming it's the traditional one," Mulder drawled, staring at the gifts in his hands then grinning up at Alex. 

"There's a... little something extra in with the truffles," Alex mumbled, still not quite believing it would be this easy. 

Mulder's eyebrows went up, and he walked to his desk, turning his back on Alex, laying down the flowers and opening the candy. "Not going to explode, is it," he tossed over his shoulder with another sexy grin. 

Alex stared at him. Amazing. It was actually working on Mulder, too. Whatever _it_ was. "No," he managed quickly. "I'd never-" He bit off the rest of the words before they could make it out, but the heartwrenchingly sweet smile Mulder shot his way told him it was wasted effort. He felt heat rise in his cheeks and almost groaned. 

As the ribbon and then the top came off the box, Mulder sucked in a sharp breath. Lifting the disk out, he studied it for a minute, then popped it into his computer and opened the first file. "Oh Alex," he breathed, in a perfect imitation of the woman in the diamond commercial. "You _shouldn't_ have." 

"You're worth it," Alex murmured softly, before he could catch himself. 

Mulder turned from his desk and walked slowly toward Alex. Alex felt his lungs stop completely, and had a moment of dizziness that he wasn't sure whether to blame on lack of oxygen or Mulder's proximity. Closer and closer and closer and... there. Alex breathed in slowly. *...oh yes...* Mulder stood perfectly still, barely inches away, not bridging the final gap. Alex inhaled again, dragging the moment out, then tripped forward with a small sound of surrender. His right hand went up to circle Mulder's neck, head canting sideways, lips meeting Mulder's on a sigh of pure delight. 

He felt Mulder's arms wrap around him and tighten, drawing him in closer even as he plastered himself against Mulder's body. The kiss deepened and sucked any remaining oxygen from his body, until when Mulder's head lifted, Alex practically swooned in his arms. Mulder grinned and steadied him. 

_Waitaminit,_ Alex's head insisted fuzzily, _I thought I was supposed to be having this affect on him..._ He blinked at Mulder, completely dazed, and lost himself in the satisfied look on Mulder's face. He tilted his head back and parted his lips as Mulder dove for his mouth again. Moaning into the kiss he managed to mumble "...are they experimenting on your pheromones too?" But apparently Mulder didn't hear him, or didn't understand him, because all he heard was a muffled laugh and then Mulder's tongue was wiping out any memory of his own question. 

When Mulder pulled back again, Alex slumped against him, gasping for breath and whispering inanely against Mulder's shirt. 

"What's that?" Mulder's soft voice filled his ear just before gentle teeth nibbled at his earlobe. 

He raised his volume without even thinking, knowing he was babbling but unable to stop the flow of words that fought to get off his tongue. So long. Waited so long. The scent of Mulder filled him, infiltrating his brain and giving him the intoxication he'd been seeking all day. "So long... wanted this... you... so long... years... never wanted anything like this... this... just this... so sorry... so sorry for everything... if I could take it all back..." 

"Sssshh." Mulder's hands stroked over his back in smooth, soothing motions. "Easy, easy." 

"No... you don't understand," he insisted desperately, burying his face in Mulder's neck. "I don't know what this _is_... I don't know how long this is going to last... and I love you... oh _god_ I love you...." Knowing he was going to regret every single thing he said didn't seem to be enough to keep him from saying it. Alex gripped Mulder tighter, then let his hand roam avidly, everywhere. He bit at Mulder's shoulder through the tshirt, then nuzzled his face into Mulder's throat, pressing for the pulse up under the jaw. "Always loved you... made such a mess of things... you... it was always you..." _Shut up Alex!_ his mind hissed. His tongue continued to ignore the order. "Trying to put things right... I swear it. I am... I have been..." 

Mulder laughed softly, breathlessly. "You're doing a pretty damn good job of it." He shivered. "Oh Alex..." His hands moved to tug at Alex's clothes. Alex twisted slightly and slid to his knees, rubbing his face down Mulder's body as he lowered himself, until he pressed his face against Mulder's jeans. " _Alex_..." Mulder's voice struck a gratifying, urgent note and Alex started fighting with the zipper, pressing open-mouthed kisses against Mulder's crotch and sucking at the worn denim. Mulder's fingers joined his and made easier work of the button and zipper, wrenching the jeans open and lifting himself free. Alex paused to look up at Mulder for a long moment, drinking him in, then sank forward and slowly fit his lips over Mulder's erection, working his mouth down, relaxing his throat. _Home._

Mulder's hands in his hair, Mulder's cock in his mouth, his name on Mulder's lips. 

For that instant, he didn't care how long it lasted. He'd thank whatever Syndicate mad scientist was running this fucking experiment, thank them for taking down Mulder's walls and giving him the chance to express... this. This worship. Whatever way he could, however briefly. 

His throat convulsed as Mulder bucked against him, but he resisted all attempts to lift him away. _Let me do this... just let me do this..._ He opened wider, offering all he could, and reveled when the hands stopped urging him to slow down, instead gripping his head and dragging him closer. His own hand clenched on Mulder's ass, pulling ever closer, sucking harder. Feeling something in his chest burst and unravel as Mulder gave a hoarse cry and came, trembling and gasping. 

Easing his mouth off of Mulder, licking slowly and imprinting all the sensory impressions he could, Alex reluctantly released his hold. Mulder took a shaky step back and sank to his knees, swaying, staring at Alex with wide eyes. 

"Alex...." 

"Mulder." His own voice was huskier than usual. He met Mulder's stare, for once not worrying about what his expression might be giving away, not trying to school the feelings out of his face. *...only for you...* He laughed helplessly as the random thought intersected with the overwrought conclusion of "Only You", but the sound caught in his throat and came out completely different than intended. 

And Mulder was leaning forward, folding him into his arms, pulling him close, and Alex fell forward, then let himself be dragged to his feet. His knees hurt but he was steadier than Mulder. They leaned against each other woozily and suddenly Mulder grinned. 

"Come with me. Something so fucking strange happened last fall, and I think you'll appreciate it..." Catching Alex's hand he dragged him into the bedroom, laughing at the look on Alex's face. Pulling him to the bed, Mulder gave one hard push and Alex sprawled on his back on the mattress, gaping at his unexpected reflection staring down from the overhead mirror. 

" _Mulder_! I'm... shocked..." Alex grinned. 

"I didn't put it up... I _swear_. And I haven't had time to take it down." Mulder was literally giggling as he crawled over Alex's body, opening clothing and tugging it off, head dipping to nip and kiss and lick as he got to bare skin. He unbuckled the prosthetic and removed it gently. Alex fought his right arm out of his shirt and let Mulder push it all over the side of the bed. 

"Well, don't take it down on my account," Alex gasped as he got an incredible view of Mulder stripping his pants from him, spreading his legs and crawling between them to lick at Alex's cock. "Mulder... Mulder, take _your_ clothes off too..." 

Mulder laughed around his mouthful, making Alex gasp again, but then dutifully sat up and stripped off his tshirt, wriggled out of his open jeans. "Better?" 

Alex gazed up at their reflections, down to Mulder in the flesh, back up to the mirror. "Oh yeah... much better," he groaned, reaching for Mulder and dragging him into a kiss. Mulder bit at his lips until Alex released him, then worked his way down Alex's body again, once again settling between widespread thighs and taking Alex into his mouth. 

Writhing on the bed, hand clenching in the blankets, Alex moaned. This was too much. Too too much... and consequently, wasn't going to last long. Almost with the thought he was arching and whimpering, climaxing helplessly even as his dazed mind screamed at him to try to make it last. _As if._ Orgasm tore through him almost painfully. "Too much..." he gasped, staring up at himself and desperately wanting to hit freeze-frame. "Too much..." as that mouth, those lips, slid away. 

"Too much what," Mulder murmured as he dragged himself up to settle next to Alex, drawing him into the circle of his arms. 

"Too much you..." Alex whispered unthinkingly, eyes closing as his trembling hand lifted to trace over Mulder's face, throat, chest, then back up to hair. Mulder's lips brushed Alex's closed eyelids and Alex could feel him smiling. 

"I love the way you get so... fractured when you get turned on," Mulder murmured silkily. "Who'dathunk you'd be such a lose-control kinda guy..." 

Alex opened his eyes and stared into the heavy-lidded look of affectionate amusement on Mulder's face. "Only you," he mumbled. 

Mulder chuckled and nuzzled Alex's shoulder, closing his eyes and relaxing. "Get your breath back. Incredible as it was, that was way too short on both counts. I'm of a mind to see just how incoherent I can make you." He pressed his lips to Alex's ear, voice a rough whisper. "...love you..." 

Heart pounding, Alex nestled closer. His own eyes stayed open this time, as he listened to a clock chime nine. He stared dreamily up at the two of them reflected in the mirror... and then suddenly caught sight of the half-naked, blond man -- with Attitude and an archery set -- standing at the end of the bed. Alex jerked in shock, his head rising off the bed. "What the fuck..." he mumbled, turning to glance at Mulder, who didn't really look to be asleep but didn't seem to be noticing anything either. 

"He can't see me," the man said casually, leaning against the bed. "I wouldn't even be appearing to you, but... well... I like _so_ hate when my family takes it into their heads to fuck around with mortals without at least letting them _know_. Mom keeps telling me to hang out with Uncle Herc, she shoulda known I'd pick that up," he grumbled. 

Alex stared at the blond and decided that he finally had his answer as to why the day had been so perfectly strange. He was losing it. Obviously. Had already lost it, perhaps. It was all a hallucination after all. But Mulder didn't feel like a hallucination. And the blond kept talking. 

"So, you know, I just wanted to... let you know that your time's up. So it wouldn't be like... a total shock." 

That sounded ominous. Alex cleared his throat. "What?" 

Cupid sighed. "You've had your twelve hours of love and adoration. Everybody's gonna go back to normal now. Time's up, I'm afraid." 

Twelve hours. Love and... oh fuck. Alex sat bolt upright. "Wait!" He turned to stare at Mulder, sprawled beside him. 

"Sorry. Can't. Those are The Rules. And don't ask about The Rules. None of us know." Cupid moved around the side of the bed, lifted one hand and bopped Alex softly on the forehead. A flash of golden light washed up off of Alex as if it was being sucked into the man's hand. 

"But..." 

Cupid smiled at him. "But hey, it was fun, wasn't it? How about those two in the grocery store?" 

The blond clapped his hands once and disappeared. Alex sat perfectly still, trying not to think, until a rustle of movement from beside him caught his attention. Turning his head slowly, he watched as Mulder rolled onto his back and opened his eyes. 

* * *

Jeffrey Spender sat up straighter in the chair he'd been slouched in all day, fingering Alex Krycek's stiletto, mooning over the perfection of the man himself. _What the hell..._ Shaking his head, he looked around and saw the clock. It was _how late_? He stood up, rubbing his forehead and moving toward the phone. What had he been thinking? Alex Krycek? He dialed the phone hurriedly. 

"Hello? Diana? Yes... is the offer of a late dinner still open? Great... see you there..." 

* * *

The Smoking Man blinked down at his yellow legal pad, where he had spent the last few hours writing "I [heart] Alex Krycek" all over it. He stared at his hand, then at the paper, then his hand, then the paper. _What the hell..._

The First Elder shifted suddenly in his chair, where he had been obviously daydreaming away most of the meeting. Shaking his head, he leaned toward the Smoking Man. CSM immediately flipped his yellow pad over, and dropped his pen. 

"That Alex Krycek..." the First Elder began, slowly, pitching his voice well under the drone of comments from the other Syndicate members. 

"Yes," managed the Smoking Man, clearing his throat. 

The First Elder paused. "Uh... nothing. Never mind." 

Nodding, the Smoking Man lit a cigarette with a shaking hand. A movement at the corner of his eye caught his attention, and he turned to see a phone being extended to him. 

"Call for you, sir. Your private line." 

"Thank you." The Smoking Man stood and stepped back into his private office. "Hello?" 

"...Conrad?" 

That voice! He sucked in a breath, hardly daring to believe. "...Teena? Teena, is that you?" 

"Yes, Conrad. It's me. I just... well, it is Valentine's Day and..." 

"Oh Teena..." 

* * *

Assistant Director Walter Skinner paused in the middle of explaining to Agent Scully exactly why his authority in demanding Alex Krycek's time outweighed hers. _What the hell..._

Agent Dana Scully froze in the act of rolling her eyes at her former superior's attempt to get her away from that _darling_ Alex Krycek. _What the hell..._

They both looked up and around slowly. Thankfully Alex Krycek seemed to be nowhere around, thought neither could place where he might have gone. 

"Agent Scully?" 

"Sir?" 

"Ah... I don't... I... that is..." 

"Sir, did I just...," Scully paused, and consulted her watch. "Did _we_ just spend over half an hour standing in the Produce section of my supermarket arguing over _Alex Krycek_? While he apparently walked away?" 

Skinner nodded slowly. "I believe we did, Agent Scully." 

Scully pondered for a long moment, staring up at him. "Can we... chalk that up to some sort of temporary insanity, sir?" 

Skinner opened his mouth, then closed it. Tried again. "I believe we can, Agent Scully." 

Thoroughly flumoxed, Scully stared up at him. "I will swear to _never_ mention this again, if you'll do the same. Sir." 

Skinner nodded immediately. Almost violently. "I will definitely swear to that. Agent Scully." 

Scully sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Well then. Goodnight. Sir." She gave him a bemused look and turned to walk away, still shaking her head. 

Skinner watched her go with a sinking heart. _Say something, Walter! Say something!_ Three steps. Four, five, six... at seven, Scully paused and turned. Walked back. 

"Um... sir? This may... well, I know this may sound rather forward but... it occurs to me that you're not my immediate superior anymore. Ah... would you care to... go for a drink? It is... Valentine's Day, after all." 

Skinner's face melted into a besotted grin. "Agent Scully! I'd _love_ to. I didn't know what to say! Didn't know what to do. I never thought I had a chance, but then ever since that day in the elevator, I've hoped..." 

Scully caught his hand in hers and started tugging him toward the exit. "You can drop the 'agent' and call me Dana, Walter." She glanced back at him with a grin and raised an eyebrow. "Unless you'd like me to use my handcuffs..." 

* * *

Alex stared down at Mulder, throat constricting. "It's gone, isn't it," he whispered. 

Mulder sat up slowly, rubbing his forehead. "What the hell..." He shook his head, shivered, and focused on Alex. "I just got the weirdest feeling. What's gone, lover?" He reached out and smoothed his hand over Alex's face, thumb coasting over Alex's lower lip. His mouth twisted into a slow smile and he leaned in to brush a kiss against Alex's nose. 

Alex blinked. "Uh..." He twisted his head around. Oddly enough, the blond man was back, hovering a foot above the floor, looking confused. Alex met his eyes. The blond scratched his head and shrugged. Alex turned back to Mulder, tilting his head to one side. "You... still want me here?" he offered in a low voice. 

Mulder's face went blank, then hardened. "What? You thought I'd have sex with you for the disk and then throw you out? Gee, thanks a lot, Krycek... high opinion of me you have there..." 

"No! But..." Alex looked over to the blond man again. 

"I have no idea," Cupid answered the unspoken question in the green eyes. He stalked closer to the bed and Alex had to stifle an almost-hysterical laugh at seeing Mulder get studied so carefully by someone he didn't even know was in the room. "The only thing I can think is... he's really into you. I guess he just needed to a little shove to realize it. Looks to me like you two are Meant To Be." 

"Alex," Mulder sounded increasingly exasperated. "Will you look at me? Are you alright? What's wrong with you?" 

Cupid tugged at his lower lip thoughtfully. "Well, dude, my recommendation would be, enjoy it," he advised Alex. "Life's too short. At least for you mortals." With another clap, he disappeared again. 

This time Alex couldn't keep the laughter from bubbling up. 

"Alex?" 

"I'm sorry, Mulder... I didn't... I wasn't..." he leaned into Mulder and laughed harder. "You just... make me really happy." 

Mulder gave him a bemused look, and pulled him closer. "Okay..." 

"I just... I gotta wonder I guess." Alex sat up and pulled back from Mulder's arms. "Flowers and candy and a confidential disk or two and suddenly all is forgiven?" He didn't know why he felt such a need to press his luck, but he suddenly found he hated the idea that Mulder might be under the influence of _anything_. Including half-naked cute blond men with bows and arrows and surfer-dude drawls. "It can't be that easy," he murmured softly. 

"No." Mulder shook his head, face serious. "It's not that easy." He arched an eyebrow at Alex. "Although I must say, the disk helped." His lips twitched. 

Alex pounced. 

* * *

Cupid watched the tussling men for a few more minutes, then sighed and tilted his head back. "Hey _Maaaa_...." 

"Yes, sweetie?" 

Cupid gestured to the bed. "So... this was the point?" 

Aphrodite grinned at the tangle of arms and legs on the bed. "Now _that's_ what I call the power of love. Yeah, this was the point. Good call on Mulder's reaction, by the way. You were right on." She tousled his hair and pinched his cheek. "Smart boy." 

Cupid jerked back and sighed. "So we had like a total city falling all over the dude for an entire day just to get him together with the depressed guy?" 

"That _depressed guy_ , as you put it, is sort of important to the continued existence of this _world_ as we, like, know it. And I don't know about you, but I _like_ mortals just as they are now. Nice and malleable." Aphrodite sniffed. "Hybrids we do _not_ need. They are _totally_ icks-ville. Anyway, I told you this really was an assignment. Those two are gonna save the world, Cupey. They just need each other to do it." 

Cupid looked at the bed doubtfully. "If you say so, Ma. So... you really think they'll both chill and actually make this work in time to save the world?" 

Aphrodite's hand went to her hips, eyes narrowing dangerously as she directed a scorching glare at the cuddling couple. "They _will_ make this work. If I have to appear personally and knock their heads together, this _will_ work." One fine eyebrow arched and she made a sound of frustration. "There's only so much 'star-crossed' bullshit I'll _take_ from lovers who fall under the Meant To Be category. And these two have _so_ used up my patience." 

Cupid ducked his head and coughed to cover his laugh. He felt a flash of sympathy for the humans. His mother's direct attention could get... interesting. _Oh well. They'll enjoy the end result._ He raised a remarkably straight face to Aphrodite. "Well then, my work here is done. World saved by the power of love, yadda yadda yadda. Later." 

Aphrodite grinned at the bed as her son disappeared. "Yes indeed. World saved. And if I can piss off Ares in the bargain, that's just a _totally_ bitchin' fringe benefit..." 

~~end~~ 

[...single song line quoted without permission, from indigo girls' "ghost". What's a schmoopy fic without a song line...] 

* * *

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